Post your funny stories, jokes, cartoons, etc.

[Don C]

This one is for Trevynd

 

[Kilgon]

 

[Don C]

 

[Kilgon]

I saw this on Facebook.  :lollerz:

 

[Don C]

I'm going to post this sign to give my wife fair warning

 

[TheRktmn]

Be careful what you text.

 

[Kilgon]

Seen this today on face book.

 

[Don C]

 

[Don C]

 

[detritusmaximus]

At the local pick-your-part junkyard port-a-potty.....
I think I'll take my chances. I forgot to ask if they had a bottle of hand sanitizer bottle sanitizer.

 

[Don C]

I know there are a few hunters on the forum, so hopefully this won't hit too close to home:

THE DEER HUNT

SATURDAY

1:00 am Alarm clock rings
2:00 am Hunting partner arrives, drags you out of bed
2:30 am Throw everything except the kitchen sink into the pickup
3:00 am Leave for the deep woods
3:15 am Drive back home and pick up gun
3:30 am Drive like hell to get to the woods to arrive before daylight
4:00 am Start setting up camp, forgot damned tent
4:30 am Head into woods
6:05 am See eight deer
6:06 am Take aim and squeeze trigger
6:07 am "CLICK"
6:08 am Load gun while watching deer run over hill
8:00 am Head back to camp
9:00 am Still looking for camp
10:00 am Finally realize you don't know where camp is
12 noon Fire gun for help, eat wild berries
12:15 pm Ran out of bullets, eight deer come back
12:20 pm Feeling strange in stomach
12:30 pm Realize you ate poison berries
12:45 pm Rescued
12:55 pm Rushed to hospital to have stomach pumped
2:00 pm Arrive back in camp
3:30 pm Leave camp to kill deer
4:00 pm Return to camp for bullets
4:01 pm Leave camp again
5:00 pm Empty gun on squirrel that’s been bugging you
6:00 pm Arrive at camp, see deer grazing in camp
6:01 pm Load gun
6:02 pm Fire gun
6:03 pm One dead pickup truck
6:05 pm Hunting partner returns to camp dragging deer
6:06 pm Repress strong urge to shoot partner
6:07 pm Fall into fire
6:10 pm Change clothes, throw burned clothes into fire
6:15 pm Take pickup, leave partner and his deer in the woods
6:25 pm Pickup boils over, hole shot in block
6:26 pm Start walking
6:30 pm Stumble and fall, drop gun in the mud
6:35 pm Meet bear
6:36 pm Take aim
6:37 pm Fire gun, barrel blows up, plugged with mud
6:38 pm $hit pants
6:39 pm Climb tree
9:00 pm Bear departs, wrap @#!% gun around tree
Midnight Home at last

SUNDAY

Watch football game on TV, slowly tearing hunting license into little pieces, place in envelope, and mail it to the Game Warden with clear instructions as to where to put it.

 

[midlife]

 

[Jcloutier0722]

My funny story is car related...being a car guy from birth, I was always riding my bike to dealerships and checking out cars...I hopped into a 73 Cougar and all of the sudden, the showroom floor erupted in shouts...I thought I was being responsible but little did I know I grabbed the rimblow horn, not knowing this feature existed, and held on for like 30s frozen in shock...needless to say they watched when I would come back in future visits and I learned not to grab the wheel when entering a car

 

[Mac]

My funny story is car related...being a car guy from birth, I was always riding my bike to dealerships and checking out cars...I hopped into a 73 Cougar and all of the sudden, the showroom floor erupted in shouts...I thought I was being responsible but little did I know I grabbed the rimblow horn, not knowing this feature existed, and held on for like 30s frozen in shock...needless to say they watched when I would come back in future visits and I learned not to grab the wheel when entering a car

Yep! Been there, done that! I bought my Mach as a demo so I did not get to pick any of the options. My car also has the rim blow wheel. Took some time to get use to it. Waved to a lot of people I did not know when I grabbed the steering wheel to turn!!!

 

[Kilgon]

I found my next project. Seems like it will be an easy build.

 

[Kilgon]

 

[midlife]

 

[Kilgon]

 

[Kilgon]

 

[midlife]

 

[Kilgon]

I can't figure out why my wife is mad at me. She asked me to wash the windows today so as a good husband I went ahead and did as she asked. She hasn't spoken to me since.